“Kay’s way” Grief and loss
About Grief and Loss
All of us like to be in control of our lives and that’s one of the reasons why loss is hard on us – for it means death (either literally or symbolically) and we feel, and usually are, totally out of control of the situation.
Some situations we cannot stop. Physical death, terminal and debilitating illnesses do not change, nor does the pain that accompanies them. We have no choice in that we will have pain when we experience a loss, but we do have a choice as to how we will experience painful losses.
A living death will result when we refuse to go on with the business of living today and the tomorrow’s before us.
We can make a decision to grow through our grief and gain a new understanding and perspective for the rest of our lives.
- We do not have a choice regarding grief, we will grieve.
- We do have a choice about the “how” of our grief
- We can choose to grieve openly and honestly or
- We can suppress it and carry it throughout our lifetime.
Our hope is that working through the material contained in our grief and loss support group will enable you to work through your grief rather than endure the process. Sorrow when shared, tends to be more manageable. Here you will find others who understand and are willing to share some of your burden with you.
Most people will tell you that separation and divorce are the most painful and stressful experiences they’ve ever faced. It’s a confusing time when you feel isolated and have lots of questions about issues you’ve never faced before. DivorceCare groups meet weekly to help you face these challenges and move toward rebuilding your life.
What to Expect?
Most people quickly feel comfortable and accepted in their DivorceCare group.
They discover that there are others who have the same kind of feelings they do—and who understand the hurt and pain they are going through. Here is an overview of the DivorceCare experience:
You’ll probably feel a little nervous about going to DivorceCare the first time.
Those feelings go away quickly for most people, usually during the first session they attend. DivorceCare is a warm, caring environment designed to help you.
You’ll discover there are people who understand your hurts, emotions and painful experiences!
You’ll learn helpful, practical information that will help you recover from your separation or divorce.
You’ll have the chance to talk about your experiences.
You’ll become part of a “family.”
Your children will have the opportunity to heal.
You’ll discover hope for the future.
Your DivorceCare experience begins each week as your group watches a video seminar on DVD. The DivorceCare videos cover topics essential to your recovery from the hurt of separation or divorce. The videos are produced in a compelling television magazine format and feature on-location video and real-life stories of people who have experienced divorce. Here is a list of the weekly topics:
1. What’s Happening to Me?
2. The Road to Healing/Finding Help
3. Facing My Anger
4. Facing My Depression
5. Facing My Loneliness
6. What Does the Owner’s Manual Say?
7. New Relationships
8. Financial Survival
10. Single Sexuality
13. Moving On, Growing Closer to God
divorce care for kids
Are your children angry, hurt, and confused about your separation or divorce? A DivorceCare for Kids (DC4K) group is a safe, fun place where your children can learn skills that will help them heal. DC4K groups blend, games, music, stories, videos and discussion to help kids process the divorce and move forward. Groups meet weekly and are designed for children ages 5-12.
What is DC4K?
For 13 weeks your children become involved in a fun, caring group that meets near you. The weekly session topics help your children learn that God’s love strengthens them and helps them turn their sadness to hope and their anger to joy.
Each session is filled with motivating and exciting activities. Games, crafts, role playing, discussion times, journaling, and activity books help your children process the divorce and move forward in their lives. The music, snacks, read-aloud stories, exercises, and Bible verses teach your children to relax and rest secure in God’s love. The Kids Like Me and Stories from the Bible video dramas present stories of children just like your children, who are experiencing divorce-related problems and have found help and encouragement.
DC4K is designed for kids 5–12 years of age.
Children look forward to each time their “DC4K family” gets together. Start your children on the road to healing today and connect them with their very own DC4K family!
Who are the DC4K leaders?
The leadership team for DivorceCare for Kids consists of people who share a genuine concern about the way divorce is affecting your children now and in the future. The DC4K team encourages children, builds relationships, and presents skills to maneuver through the rough places of divorce, while pointing students to Jesus as their healer.
DC4K leaders have an excitement for the DC4K program and have participated in leadership training.
“I have a deep understanding of what these kids are experiencing because I still remember the hurt I felt as a child when my parents divorced … now I can help these kids.”
— DC4K leader, NC
What your child will experience
DC4K is a special group that provides a safe and caring place for your children to engage in fun-filled activities while learning about the divorce and the many changes they are encountering in their lives. All of the activities fit into a two-hour weekly format. Each group meets for 13 consecutive weeks.
From participating in group activities and games to eating and laughing together, children have fun at DC4K.
Viewing the specially written Kids Like Me video helps children learn how to deal with daily dilemmas children of divorce face. In the Stories from the Bible video the children learn about people in the Bible who experienced some of the same difficulties they are experiencing.
Expressing themselves through arts and crafts projects centered on the weekly topic provides entertainment while helping your children process the divorce. Interesting projects include bubble printing, homemade Etch A Sketch®, illusion-noculars, thumbprint art, forgiveness cards, drawing, painting, creating, and much more.
Listening to a read aloud storybook connects your children with real-life situations involving other children in divorce. These stories offer practical suggestions for dealing with the many struggles each child faces. The stories also serve as a springboard for heartfelt discussions with you, their DC4K leaders, and other people in their lives.
Playing games helps children understand changes divorce brings, promotes teamwork, helps them deepen their trust bonds, and encourages them to lean on each other and to minister to one another with the love of God.
Connecting with caring leaders and interacting with other children in small group discussions, devotions, and demonstrations helps your children better understand their individual situations.
Children will hear relevant and age-appropriate Bible passages. These verses will guide them how to respond in difficult circumstances and assure them of God’s love for them.
Eating together and being introduced to comfort foods, stress-reducing foods, and foods that help children focus helps provide your children with a feeling of connectedness in a stress-free atmosphere.
Laughing and having fun with other children gives every child an opportunity to make and enjoy newfound friends at DC4K.
Journaling and drawing pictures in their DC4K Activity Book helps your kids sort through their feelings.
Singing and listening to cheerful music, written to bring comfort, helps soothe hurt feelings.
Stretching, breathing, and physical exercise help reduce stress levels.
Children come to DC4K excited to connect with their newfound friends. Each session is filled with engaging activities that center around a weekly theme. These topics correlate with those discussed in the adult DivorceCare sessions. When you and your children are learning about similar topics each week, you create many opportunities to bond and enrich your family.